You Can't Love Movies and Live in Mississippi at the Same Time!
December 29th 2008 13:08
There are many obvious reasons why living in Mississippi sucks. First, we are not only the most obese state, but we are in a constant battle with Louisiana and Arkansas as to who is the poorest. It is like we truly make an effort to be there. Second, dating in Mississippi is not only limited due to the amount of people who live in the state, but it also certainly guarantees that you will be dating someone who is either full of STD's, is divorced, has multiple children from multiple parents, or all of the above. And third, the infrastructure in the entire state is worthless, making it all the more difficult to get to the two or three places in the entire state where there are things that even remotely resemble some form of entertainment.
The bottom line is this: If you have ever seen anyone from Mississippi talk on camera, i.e. during Katrina, that person truly does represent the entire state (myself excluded of course).
Anyway, what I really wanted to talk about has to do with the fact that no one can be a true movie critic and live in Mississippi. The consequences from the list above trickles down into the daily lives of Mississippians state-wide. And, unless you have money and can afford the gas, you are not going to see the movies the real movie critics are raving about.
Because of its audience, it is no wonder why Mississippi is not a haven for major studios and their precious Oscar-worthy movies. The people of Mississippi simply do not require that kind of brain power. Unless your movie is titled Transformers, the people here simply don't care.
I heard a nasty rumor that Mississippi will get The Wrestler on January 16th. My fingers are crossed that the idiots of this state will not see it based on it's title alone.
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